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73. Foster Care, Adoption and the Church: 2022 Year End Round Table

About this Episode

It’s time for the year-end round table! Episode 57 on Foster Care, Adoption & the Church was a hit, so we are revisiting the theme of foster care, adoption, and the church while adding new voices. Our guests are Darren Freidinger, Amber Nelson, and Jessica Autrey, each has fostered and/or adopted children including special needs children and international adoptions. In this episode, we discuss ways in which churches and individuals can practically care for orphans and their families ensuring vulnerable children will grow up in loving families.

Our guests are here to share their experiences with the state, private adoption agencies, and churches. If you have ever considered adoption, this episode is a must! And if you haven’t ever considered adopting or fostering, this episode is still a must, as our guests are passionate advocates for children and want to see more placements in Christian homes.

If our guests cannot convince you to foster or adopt, you will still be given food for thought as we ask questions like: What do Christian anarchists think about the state being involved with vulnerable children? Is adoption easier through the state or private adoption agencies? How many families are willing and waiting to adopt children? Why are churches not ensuring children have healthy and safe homes? What can Christians do to help families rearing adopted children?

Connect with Jay:

Amber Nelson’s fan page

Episode Timestamps:

1:05 - Guest introductions

  • Darren

    • Returning guest from episode 57

      • Popular episode with good response

    • Two adopted daughters

    • Fostering 3 younger children, waiting to begin their adoption processes

  • Jessica

    • Eight children, 3 are adopted from Ukraine in 2011

  • Amber

    • Music Teacher in public school

    • Three sons

8:15 – How do we feel about the state being involved in child foster care?

  • Craig: 

    • Doesn’t like the state being involved in child protection

  • Darren: 

    • As bad as the situation is for children right now, the state made the right call on the girls in his care

    • Christ following parents need to be involved

    • The church could do better than the state

  • Amber: 

    • The children of addicts and mental health problems need better equipped helpers.

    • Child safety is top priority

    • As a schoolteacher, she saw that the caseworkers were so overwhelmed that referrals did not help suspected abused children

  • Jessica: 

    • Real cases fall through the cracks

    • But when parents make decisions such as not vaccinating them, the state may become involved

    • Wanted to adopt from her first child to ensure children had the love she wanted to give her son

    • Saw a blog about the conditions of special needs orphans in Eastern Europe

      • Special needs children are discarded

      • Orphanage care is patchy, but especially terrible for special-needs children

      • Experience in helping people with Downs Syndrome

22:09 – Roe v Wade

  • When people are happy about the overturning, they should be willing to adopt kids

  • It is easier to adopt children from other countries because the US government interferes

    • It took Amber a year to get a license to adopt

    • There are a lot of arbitrary rules that change between case-workers

    • There are invasions of privacy while you foster

    • The state is an obstacle to adoption

  • There is a waiting list for adopting infants

  • The children come with traumas

  • Roe v Wade did not end abortion, just sent the decision back to the states

    • It’s just politics

  • Older children, sibling groups or those born with health issues face barriers to adoption

33:20 – Adoption and the church

  • Why are churches not ensuring children have healthy and safe homes?

    • Craig has never heard it in church

    • When Amber has heard it is has been an addendum to the service

    • The Baptist church sometimes runs training for foster parents

    • There’s no sermons about it

  • Darren’s experience in church has been hit-and-miss

    • His church has a November adoption month

  • Darren wants individuals helping families adopting children

    • Babysit the children and let the parents go shopping

    • Hang out with parents with eight children

      • Have an adult conversation

    • At least don’t judge or ask silly questions

  • Amber had some good experiences of help from individuals

  • Jessica has not seen adoption preached

  • Christians helped Jessica to make the adoption process happen through donations

  • Now attends a pro-adoption church

47:21 – Is the state still involved in private adoptions?

  • Yes, there is paperwork and administrative processes

  • Even privately there is a mountain of paperwork

  • In Darren’s experience fostering through the state was easier

    • But the state is involved to an intimate degree though

52:30 – What can individuals do to help families with adopted children?

  • Jessica:

    • Voice your support for families with adopted or fostered children

      •  Tell them if you are praying for them

    • Don’t give useless advice

    • Do give hand-me-downs

    • Just show up and play with the kids or give adult conversations

    • Show up to fundraisers and get the word out

  • Amber:

    • Think about what the kids go through, then consider adopting

    • Do laundry, that would help

  • Darren:

    • Agrees with Jessica and Amber

    • Consider adopting or fostering

      • The children need Christians

    • Take someone a meal when they take charge of their children

    • Take the kids to the park for an hour


Related Episodes

Related Blog Post

72. Christian Nationalism: Waging an Unholy War with Jay Newman

About this Episode

Jay Newman from Catacomb Podcasts joins Craig to discuss voting and Christian nationalism. Jay’s day job is pitmaster at Shotgun Willie’s Barbecue in Nashville, and he also runs his own barbecue catering service, Newman Family Barbecue. When he’s not transforming meat into award-winning tasty goodness, Jay bravely ventures into the culture wars on Twitter. While debating Christian nationalists and exposing their beliefs, he’s been accused of “reading too much evangelical pop theology” from those caught up in the military mindset of taking the reigns of power to expand the physical territories of the gospel.

Although George Bush was blasted for using the term “crusade” in the early 2000s, Christians are arming themselves for the new crusades and crying out for “jihads for Jesus”. This is the natural progression of Christian nationalism and does not look like what Jesus wants from His followers. Jesus was a pacifist and not interested in using the mechanics of state power to achieve the bringing of His Kingdom. When He came to earth, Jesus rejected the opportunity to reign over earthly kingdoms and allowed His enemies to kill Him. 

The early church understood this and were also anti-state pacifists. Even after the church and state became friends with Constantine, attempting to grab state power has never worked well for Christians. Jay would prefer Christians leave state control to non-Christians. In truth, any Christian who tries to exercise power antithetical to the Kingdom will have to deal with their inherent hypocrisy.

Connect with Jay:

Instagram: Newman Family BBQ

Podcast: Catacomb Podcasts

Episode Timestamps:

2:48 – Who is Jay Newman?

  • BBQ Pit Manager

    • Transforming meat into beautiful goodness

  • Thinker and Writer

  • Contrarian

    • Doubting and testing new ideas

  • Multi-cultural ties

    • Brazilian and French family members

  • Pastor’s kid

    • Parents appalled by the merging of church and state

    • No party loyalty

  • Felt lied to by Bush after 9/11

  • Learnt what politics does to people watching Mike Hukabee

    • He drastically changed

    • Became more Republican than Christian

    • He sold out

  • Ron Paul 2012

    • Realized the whole thing is rigged

13:50 - Are you morally culpable for who you vote for? 

  • People sanitize their favourite candidates 

  • Society seems to have accepted that you are morally culpable for the actions of your candidates

  • No nuance in liking some, but not all of a candidate’s policies

  • All politicians commit atrocities

    • Drones

    • Aiding the rich and oppressing the poor

    • None are consistent with Jesus

      • Then who can we vote for?

  • What power is there in voting?

    • Maybe its time that all Christians stopped being a voting block

      • Politicians would stop quoting scripture

      • Politicians would stop pretending to care about Christian things

  • Anarchy and Christian anarchy are separate issues

16:50 – Is voting a sin?

  • Craig says yes

    • If rejecting God is not a sin, then what is?

    • The early church’s response to the Roman Empire

  • Jay won’t judge others

    • Sin comes from an individual’s intentions

    • One can vote with a clean conscience

      • Through being detached from outcomes

    • Daniel was not removed from the state where he lived

  • Christians should have a loud opinion on the state’s injustices

  • Life in society means you have some influence

    • Political influence is a part of that

  • Jay leaves room for those who believe that working in the state is where God wants them

    • It will probably corrupt them

    • Historically it typically goes bad

      • Why risk it?

    • Perhaps people need to figure it out on their own

  • Craig can’t force people into believing the same as himself

    • People become more entrenched in their places if forced

  • We’ve been electing Christians since the founding of the US

    • Things are still getting progressively worse

    • The country is an Idiocracy

  • The upside of Trump being elected is it exposes the cultural Christians

    • Baptist church choir “Make America Great Again”

    • Nationalism was a sin of Israel

    • Christians advocate repeating Israel’s folly

    • Christians call themselves “Christian Nationalists”

  • Christians should repent of putting people in power 

    • America has killed a holocaust of people

    • Killed children in Yemen

32:41 – Are we Americans or Christians first?

  • Who is the biggest enemy of Americans?

    • The biggest threat is the American government

  • The largest church growth is happening in Iran, China and Russia

    • The interests of the American state are opposed to the Kingdom

      • Christians are thriving in places of persecution

      • Christians should be more loyal to the church family than their national goals

    • The US is sanctioning them, making life harder for Christians

    • The populations of those nations are not our enemies

    • We should be pro Christians in other states more than our national borders

36:06 – Jesus was not a statist

  • Jesus was a snark

    • All anarchists are snarks

  • The leaders tried to trap Him 

  • Everything belongs to God

  • Pay your taxes to be a good citizen

    • Trust God for financial provision

    • It’s good for the gospel

    • Don’t make decisions out of fear of lack of resources

    • When you need money, He will give it to you

      • When you put your trust in Him

  • Jesus was passive-aggressive towards the state

  • He turned down ruling the state when the devil offered it

  • Why would Christians want to try it?

44:13 – Twitter conversations

  • A pastor once said: “Start taking hills for Christ”

    • Military terminology

  • Jay’s response: “You take hills by dying; that’s what Jesus did”

    • Jesus came to bring peace to the world

    • The opposite of military actions

  • Christians seem nervous about what would happen if Christians wielded power

    • More than infidels, pagans and demons having political power

  • Defending the crusades and name calling

  • The early church were all pacifists and anti-state

55:39 – Spiritual warfare versus worldly warfare

  • Jay sang on hills in India that had never heard the praises of God

    • That’s how to take hills for Christ in the spiritual realm

    • Not with military might, not physical territory

  • Nations are a group of people with a common cause

  • Christian nationalists want control of the state for Christians

    • This has never worked before

    • People agree with “jihad for Jesus”

    • People want to take physical territory for Christ

      • And enemy nations

    • Christians arming themselves for the next crusades

      • This is the logical conclusion for Christian nationalism

  • We should be considering ourselves exiles rather than citizens

  • The political system doesn’t give us a real say

  • If Jesus was alive today, who would he vote for?

    • Kings don’t vote


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46. Who is your God? with ian minielly

Former Green Beret Ian Minielly joins us in this episode to talk about Christians and the military. Ian joined the army after college because he didn’t have a better direction for his life. After many years, he became a Christian and chose not to reenlist. Ian now serves as a Southern Baptist Pastor and has written several books about different issues, and encourages young Southern Baptist church kids not to join the military.

As Christians, we are called to love, not kill. Ian has seen firsthand how the work our military does is not accomplishing any good; it is harming innocent people -- both the foreign nationals and the US soldiers. He is a Southern Baptist pastor now and works to change people’s perspective on the state and how it relates to Jesus and the church.

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Timestamps:

2:50 How Ian got here

  •   Didn’t like the life timeline presented to him

    • Career, 2 marriages, retirement, pain, death

    • So, he joined the army

      • Infantry → Green Beret

      • Found Jesus

        • Told Him, “If my unit doesn’t kill a soul this deployment, I will not re-enlist.”

          • They didn’t kill a soul.

        • Went to seminary (for free)

        • Now in full-time ministry

8:50 War

  • “What we're doing has nothing to do with what Jesus asked us to do… He didn't ask us, he commanded us to love our neighbor. That includes not killing them, I would suppose, right?” -Craig

  • What the military does overseas has nothing to do with Jesus

    • In fact, they command you to not share Him with anyone while you’re deployed

      • So, Ian left a box of sermon tapes with a local contact at the end of one deployment

15:42 Guns

  • Passivism

  • Craig bought a gun to shoot intruders, but now, only shoots recreationally

    • “That’s not an invitation for anybody to come and give me any trouble. I’ll give you a hug. I’m not gonna shoot you, but I’ll give you a hug.” - Craig

  • Ian is a militant pacifist

    • “I'm not going to kick in your door and shoot you, but I might shoot you if you kick mine in.” - Ian

      • Unless you’re just stealing

  • Argument: I’m being violent toward my family members if I let someone else attack them

    • “If somebody comes to try and mess with my cats, we're going to have a problem. I'm not gonna shoot you, but we're gonna wrestle.” - Craig

    • You can harm someone without killing them

      • Martial arts

      • Break their arm

      • Stop them from harming others, but do not kill

21:03 The Violence of Government

  • Love your neighbor

    • It’s not loving to put somebody bad in charge of them

      • US government is repeatedly guilty of mass murderer

      • Everyone thinks their side is the lesser of two evils

        • They’re both evil.

22:27 Jesus is the Epitome of Everything a Bad Roman Wants to Be

  • “When the Messiah shows up and he is nothing like what they are looking for, they totally miss him because they’re looking for majesty and a big white horse and a crown and a sword. And he shows up wearing flip flops and a robe and saying, ‘Love your neighbor.’” -Ian

  • 5 Controversies

    • 22:45 1. Jesus forgives and heals a lame man (Mark 2:1-12)

      • Only God has the authority to forgive sins

        • He proved He had the authority by healing

          • If Jesus is God, that means He’s the Messiah

            • If He’s the Messiah, that means He wasn’t there to conquer and give the Jews power

            • He was giving the Kingdom to the lowly

            • His goal was not to glorify the religious leaders

            • American Christians would gladly crucify Him today, just as the Jews did then

    • 26:43 Sidetrack: Do we love our neighbors?

      • We hear that preached all the time, but has it actually clicked?

      • Do even love Jesus?

      •  We love Jesus as if he in the state are equal partners

        • We've lost our first love

      • Church attendance and baptism numbers are low

      • Most pastors are thrilled to have our troops deployed

        •  Ian is a unicorn

    • 28:13 2. Jesus associates with sinners (Mark 2:13-17)

      • Pharisees wonder if a righteous man can do that because he’d get soiled

        • Christians today act the same way

          • Churches rejecting gay people

        • Jesus hung out with

          • Gay people

          • Prostitutes

          • Druggies

      • Where can we hear the Word of God preached without hate?

      • What people do is none of my business. I've been instructed to love 

      • Much of the church outside the Jewish community started out practicing homosexuality as part of their religious life

        • If the church had always blocked out gay people from entering, there would not be a church today

      • Southern Baptist churches would not perform a gay wedding, but they welcome anyone of any lifestyle in the door

        • If they're not allowed in the church to hear the Word, how are they going to find Jesus?

        • The Pharisees kept those people away

          • Their power depended on division

            • They had to make the distinction that they were better than others

            • Very little faith involved

          • Jesus ate with them

            • They heard His message because He saw them

      • Another example: Woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11)

        • Pharisees test Jesus

          • The Law says to stone her to death

          • Jesus asks whoever has never sinned to throw the first stone

            • They all walk away

          • He tells the lady she’s forgiven and to stop sinning

            • Clean slate

            • Even when we do it again, we get another clean slate and encouragement to try again

            • He forgives every single type of sin

            • Other people’s sins are none of our business

    • 37:30 3. Jesus’ disciples aren’t fasting (Mark 2:18-22)

      • Pharisees point it out so people will see Him as a bad Jew

      • Fasting was a very visible practice

        • Makes one look righteous

      • Jesus says they’re not fasting because He is with them

        • They’ll fast when He leaves

        • We’re in a fast from Jesus, waiting for His return

    • 40:00 4. Keeping the Sabbath (Mark 2:23-28)

      • Pharisees tried to make Jesus look unworthy because He and His followers weren't keeping the Sabbath rules

      • Jesus showed them at the Sabbath is a gift to man, not about rule-following

      • They had taken God's rules and elevated them above God

        • The Sabbath is meant to help us grow closer to God

    • 41:25 5. Doing good on the Sabbath (Mark 3:1-6)

      • Jesus healed the man with the crippled hand

        • Violated the regulations

      • It's always the right time to do good

        • You don't take a Sabbath from doing good

        • It's never time to do wrong

    • Making the world a better place is simple: just love each other

43:27 Churches are empty because we’ve made the state the highest god

  • God gets relegated to Sundays and maybe Wednesdays

  • Nobody wants to believe in Somebody that we don’t actually believe in

  • Faithfulness to God almost always means we won't be faithful to the government

  • We essentially have a national church because we back up everything the United States government does

    • People can't see (or won't admit) that everything it does is evil

    • They support the troops

  • The five controversies basically boil down to this: Where do you put the state/your governing authority and where do you put God?

45:53 Connection between church and military

  • Southern Baptist churches are the number one biggest supporter of the military

    • They believe it honorable to send their kids to fight overseas

    •  Why are they the strongest supporters? 

      • What are they hearing in Sunday School? 

      • What is going wrong with the way we pray and preach?

      • Why do they want to send their kids over to fight people who don't even want to fight us?

  • If only Air Force planes dropped Bibles instead of bombs

  • Helping kids decide not to join the military

    • Only one Ian talked to still signed up

    • Telling them the statistics of divorces, alcoholism, and infidelity among military spouses

    • Proving that our governments never been right about anything, and killing the people they tell you to won't accomplish anything

      •  Where did we get the right to go into another country and kill people?

51:01 Who are we fighting?

  • Afghani villagers came across American troops and thought they must be Russian. They didn't know anything about 9-11 or even where New York was

    • Do the Christians supporting these wars understand that the people in these countries have nothing to do with what we’re supposedly fighting about?

      • We're destroying their land, and they've never even heard of us

    • Our troops traveled around and millions of dollars of equipment with guns pointing in all directions from their tanks

      • The only people around were unarmed villagers wearing flip-flops and simple robes who just wanted to sit around and enjoy life

    • Many suicide bombers were coerced into doing it

      •  Oftentimes, their families were tied up at gunpoint

      • OR They are angry because the Americans killed their family, so they are getting revenge

  • God is everywhere in Afghanistan

    •  but will those people ever accept Jesus since He's associated with our country?

    •  Will they ever listen to an evangelist?

57:35 DHS is a terrible part of the government

59:15 Ian’s other books

32. The Troops’ Battle, The State’s Evils: Waging War with Eric Campbell and Nicolas Harrelson

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What if everything you have been told about the War on Terror has been a lie?  

In this episode Craig talks with veterans Eric Campbell and Nicolas Harrelson about their experiences as servicemen who toured in Iraq. They discuss how their experiences changed their view on war, and led them on a path to anarchism. Putting a face on the humanity in Iraq and learning that the people there are everyday men and women who are just trying to provide for their families and live in peace, brought about a change in perception for these men. Discovering that the military presence and intervention has caused more harm than good, and the people of Iraq preferred Saddam to the US military was a sobering realization. What is the truth, and why do we continue to occupy these countries? 

LINKS & STARTING POINTS:

2:33 Eric’s Background 

  • 20+ years of service 

  • Professional national guardsman 

  • E5 sergeant 

  • Radio operator/communications specialist 

3:51 Nicolas’ Background

  • 2nd deployment to Iraq 2011

  • Wounded on second deployment, October 2011

16:05 Eric’s Story of being in the military & deployed overseas

  • Got to know the locals

  • Conditioned to believe that “they” were evil and vile

  • Dealt with normal everyday truck drivers who were not devoutly religious Muslims but instead...stereotypical truck drivers

  • Realized he was lied to about what kind of people the Iraqi people were 

  • The lies and propaganda is in the American churches, media, and military training 

  • The Iraqi people are just normal everyday people struggling to survive, and we ruined that. 

32:36 Nicolas’ Story of being in the military & deployed overseas

  • The United States being in conflict and war with other countries has been normalized 

  • There is no longer peace between us and the rest of the world 

  • There has been a complete dehumanization of others 

  • The effects of war on his friends 

  • Suicide of friends he served with 

  • Began putting a human face on the “others”

  • “It says a lot about the effects we have had in Iraq when the Iraqi people rather have Saddam as opposed to what we have brought them” 

  • We have been involved in the war on terror for 20 years 

  • Created the perfect storm of ambiguity that allows for the government to do as they please 

  • Creates broken individuals(veterans)

  • How does the war effect those who didn’t ask to be involved?

  • Heavy burden to bear 

44:56 We have not been in a declared war since World War 2

  • Military industrial complex benefits from perpetual war

  • Conflict profits the government by growing it 

  • “For every terrorist we kill, multiple are created” 

  • Average everyday Americans are sucked into the cycle 

  • War makes money 

  • The soldiers are there to protect Halliburton and those connected to Halliburton and their profits

  • Every aspect of the military has some company tied to it 

54:02 Afghan Papers 

  • In-depth account of evidence that the military strung along the public and the government to perpetually continue the mission in Afghanistan and Iraq, as a means to continue receiving funding 

  • War and conflict has become normalized 

  • The United States government has always been the aggressor in all of these conflicts 

  • There are no sensible and rational arguments for going into Iraq and Afghanistan 

  • We trained Saddam Hussein

  • Bin Laden trained by CIA

59:56 There is a need for ministry and mental health assistance in the military 

  • War should be the last resort of failed diplomacy 

  • There is a large number of service men and women who believe that war should be a last resort 

1:09:59 Eric’s gaming blog: The Anarchist Gamer on blogspot